Original Ideas for the Choomongous
The Texas Rangers are the Steve Jobs of the baseball food world—constantly innovating and providing the world something they didn’t realize they desperately needed.
And so, enter the Choomongous, a “24-inch Asian beef sandwich with spicy slaw on the bun.” But the Choomongous didn’t just happen, it required hours of hard work to be discovered.
These were their original ideas:
You’re Going to Need a Bigger Beltre: A three pound open-faced burger with no toppings. Adrian Beltre doesn’t like things touching the top of his head either.
Elvis Andrus’ Elvish Treats: For only $95, a variety of otherworldly treats will be brought by your seat every inning. Also, each will be topped with a bacon glaze.
The Lie Down and Nap in Our Neal Cotts: For $60, you will begin consuming a 75-inch hot dog, loaded down with bacon, pulled pork, and pork candy. If you finish, you will be escorted to a hospital bed.
Texas Eggs Benedict with Derek Hollandaise: Seven poached eggs, an entire package of Thomas’ English Muffins, and in place of Canadian Bacon, pure 100% Nolan Ryan smoked beef, all topped in a lemony hollandaise sauce mixed by Derek Holland himself. Served during weekend day games only.
Graze the Fielder: For $39.99, you’ll get the boomin’ sampler pack of bacon, hot dogs, hamburgers, barbecue sandwiches, and french fries, all stuffed into a sack and topped with thousand island dressing.
The Mitch Moreland: Double the size of any of the previously listed meals for only $11.99!
(Photo by @espn_durrett)